In an interesting twist for divorce lawyers, more attorneys are saying they are fielding questions from so-called "helicopter parents" who want to help their children with a marital split. The parents are aptly named, according to the lawyers, who say that they hover around their children's affairs, attempting to help with the divorce proceedings. Sometimes, these ever-present parents can be assets, but they can also add to the stress associated with divorce.
The phenomenon is a result of the "Trophy Children" generation, as it has been named by some critics. Young people who are currently 11 to 30 years old have been constantly praised, according to social observers, and they depend more than ever on the older generations. These people tend not to be independent problem solvers, so their parents step in to help.
Attorneys have found that a few simple tricks can be used to manage "helicopter parents," both from their perspective and the viewpoint of the adult children. First, it is important that the divorcing couple realize that they should be the only people making formal decisions about the split with their attorneys. Working with parents, attorneys can help provide the information needed to make those decisions, but they need to step back when the time comes to draft the actual agreement.
Similarly, "Trophy Children" need praise in order to function. Parents need to praise their children for their efforts during the divorce, and the divorcing spouses ought to praise each other. That helps mediation go smoother and prevents emotional distress.
Enlisting the assistance of friends and family through social media can also be advantageous for this generation. Posting inquiries about divorce and custody for Facebook friends to answer, for example, could be beneficial. Finally, make sure that the "Trophy Children" and their parents see the payoff that will come from the divorce, whether that comes from a palatable custody arrangement or an appropriate division of property.
By taking the time to examine these attributes of the divorce, these children can experience a more successful and respectful divorce proceeding, according to professionals.
Source: Huffington Post, "When adult Trophy Children divorce, parents are along for the ride," Nancy Fagan, July 19, 2012
Source:
http://www.newyorkfloridalaw.com/blog/2012/08/how-to-deal-with-helicopter-parents-during-divorce.shtml